Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Mr. Slow Flow

Evidence (of Dilated Peoples) just dropped his debut; "The Weatherman LP." It is definitely worth picking up. Here is the first video from the release:

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Clipse - Rex Theater - Pittsburgh, PA - 3/1/2007

It was such a low key event; that I had no idea that the Clipse were about to perform, until the lights came on and Pusha T and Malice were standing onstage in all their Bathing Ape and Ice Cream glory diving directly into “Momma, I’m So Sorry.” The Clipse don’t fear Tubbs and Crockett and neither did the Pittsburgh crowd of about 300 on this evening, as they loudly finished the chorus for the group.

After only 1 song, I knew that the Clipse were about to deliver the best Hip-Hop show that I have ever witnessed. No flashy lights, no annoying hypeman, no drawn out introduction; just 2 dudes, with 2 mics, giving a 45 minute intricately spit ode to cocaine.

The group focused primarily on their new "XXL rated" album, "Hell Hath No Fury." They did delve into some older material off of the "We Got It For Cheap" mixtapes and a few tracks off of their previous LP, "Lord Willin." They brought out Re-Up Gang member, Ab-Liva, to perform his verses on "Cot Damn" and "Ride Around Shining," the former being one of the best received songs of the evening.

They didn't spend too much time talking, but they did thank the fans who have supported their "Eastcoast lyric driven cocaine rap" throughout the years. They said Lil Wayne "wasn't shit" and called him a "kissing cousin" (due to his affinity for kissing his "father", Baby.) They also released a brief statement to their current record label by saying, "Fuck Jive!"

The set went by all too fast, but I was able to truly grasp what I was witnessing: greatness. I will stress again the simplicity of the performance, but that is what made it special, because these are two rappers who are not only great on wax, these are two people who haven't forgotten the long lost art of the Hip-Hop live show.


Momma I'm So Sorry
We Got It For Cheap
What Happened To That Boy?
Keys Open Doors
Ride Around Shining (Feat. Ab Liva)
Cot Damn (Feat. Ab Liva)
Chinese New Year
Wamp Wamp (What It Do)
Mr. Me Too

P.S. They didn't have merch. I had heard great stories about how they used to sell CLIPSE aprons at their shows. Wait, why would you need a CLIPSE apron? Oh, I get it!

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

"Creepin On Ah Comeback!"

This year marks the major label return of Cleveland's biggest hip hop group, Bone Thugs N' Harmony, and a new album from the almighty Ringworm;Cleveland's longest standing hardcore unit. Both of these releases are equally important in the quest to make this city known as more than the "mistake by the lake."

Ringworm have never gotten the true respect that they deserve and have always lived in Integrity's shadow in the eyes of many. Unlike Integrity, Ringworm have NEVER put out a bad album, their last one actually contained moments of sheer excellence. Ringworm has been a band for the 2nd time longer than most bands are for the first time (9 years)! The Human Furnace is actually more evil than Dwid and has eaten his own dog's shit before. Frank "3 Gun" came back to help with the writing process for the new album and early reports say it sounds like Ringworm mixed with a heavy Suicidal Tendencies/Kreator influence! Ringworm will never be "jocked" and they will never sell a lot of records. What they will do is drink all of your beer, be the biggest cult band in hardcore, and continue to write modern crossover classics 16 years after their original incarnation first took the stage wearing John Wayne Gacy makeup. Look for their new album, "The Ninth Circle," on Victory Records this summer.

Bone Thugs N' Harmony have sold over 35 million records and won a Grammy Award in 1997. They need no introduction. Actually, they might! They have been out of the limelight for quite sometime and the only time you hear about them is when Bizzy Bone (no longer in the group) is on Texas radio speaking in tongues. Although the loss of Bizzy will certainly affect the group, Bone's are true pioneers of many of the styles of hip-hop that are in heavy rotation today, and here is to hoping they can once again make people take note of the Midwest.

Cockblockin' wishes both groups a successful 2007.

Below you will find the new music video of Bone Thugs N' Harmony's new single, "I Tried" that Universal Music Group doesn't want you to see...yet.

Terror Tour 2/17/2007

Buske and I stayed at Martin’s and slept on the couch with his strange array of cats. He isn’t a “Cat Guy” yet, but he is close. My aunt is a “Cat Lady.” It’s sad that the only thing anybody knows about her is that she likes cats and alcohol and all her birthday or Christmas presents are restricted to those two categories.

My cousin got shot once and tried to cover it up to protect his friend (the shooter). My aunt was interrogating people, following people, showing up unannounced at homes, until she eventually found the shooter herself and got him arrested. She was on the local news and they called her, “Marshall Mom.” My cousin actually served more jail time than the shooter because he initially lied to the police and said "a black guy" did it.

All good things must come to an end, and on the 17th day of the 2nd month of the calendar year of 2007, The All For Revenge United States Tour did just that. The final show was completely sold out and held at the Showcase Theatre in Corona, CA. There couldn’t have been a better finale to a great tour.

War of Ages kicked off the show with some technical difficulties forcing them to play a short set. They will be back soon as part of the Facedown Festival at the Glasshouse. Terror can’t play at the Glasshouse. I’m surprised Terror can play anywhere with their past history of “riots” and their current trend involving Fat Jugs Hernandez threatening promoters and large security men at every other show.

Stick To Your Guns really showed that they are an on the verge of something major with their performance. The sing-along to the only Stick To Your Guns song that people know was DEAFENING.

All Shall Perish once again played over their set time. When Fat Jugs Hernandez went to rectify the situation, he was assaulted by their female stage potatoes. They threw him off the stage and repeatedly kicked him in the penis and testicles. When he went outside, more drama ensued. I am not really sure what happened because I was upstairs dealing with young, sweaty, impatient children attempting to buy concert memorabilia, but I heard it was quite interesting. In a Dekalb, IL barn circa 1991, “Mean” Steve Murad once said, “Equal rights mean equal lefts.” You can read Martin’s thoughts on the incident at

I personally don’t have a problem with any bands with the exception of Chiodos and Trivium. I really don’t even have a problem with them, I just say it to look cool and make it look like I am involved in some sort of “rock beef”, in hopes that it will spike my own album’s soundscan when it drops. I didn’t mind anyone in All Shall Perish. I don’t really know what happened. The only thing that bothered me about them was that their guitar player took his guitar into a shopping mall and proceeded to play wailing solos in the food court. Seriously.

The Warriors played an inspired set that really got the crowd fired up. This band really grew on me throughout the tour and I expect big things out of them. I appreciate the fact that they really bring something different to the table yet are still undeniably hardcore. Everyone in the band looks completely different and appears that they should not be in a band together. It reminds me of high school when you would occasionally see a group comprised of jocks, burnouts, and preppy girls. What could possibly bring those groups together? Drugs, of course.

Marshall is a complete tweaker. He isn’t a tweaker in the traditional sense where he snorts homemade “Scat” from a pen and later uses it to thwart an alien attack, he is just a weirdo who has accompanying hand gestures for every statement he makes. His hand gestures remind me of an older kid on the back of the school bus trying to show a 7th grader how to properly fingerblast a girl. If he, Scott Wade, and Misha were ever drunk in the same room, my head would implode. Javier is a man-child with strange hair. They used to call Shawn Kemp a man-child when he first started in the NBA. Then his scoring average dipped while his illegitimate children average rose. Of course, that happened when he played for the Cleveland Cavaliers. Can Cleveland ever catch a break?

During Terror I realized that most people don’t know how to stage-dive. They get onstage and have to run all the way to the back of the drum riser to have a huge running start before they eventually jump. On their way, they always seem to knock into someone actually playing a musical instrument knocking it out of tune or breaking it. It's obviously not important for the band to actually be able to play, what sense would that make? I see why Frank 3 Gun always wanted to play with 15 foot barricades separating him from the animals. On this day some jack-off ran into Buske’s bass smashing it against the wall. Sick. All you need to do is get on stage, take one step, Jump and in midair twist your body. It's actually a pretty dumb thing when you think about it, so maybe you shouldn't even do it. You like a band, so you go to see a live exhibition of their music, you get so inspired by their rock songs that you stand onstage next to the band, and then proceed to jump off of the stage onto other concertgoer's heads. Yeah, weird.

The show ended, no one got beat up (except Fat Jugz, by 2 girls), and everyone had fun (except Fat Jugz because he got beat up by 2 girls). We loaded out, said our goodbyes to the bands we just toured with, and Buske and I headed back to Martin’s house for another night of cats, Celebreality, and high speed internet.

Friday, March 2, 2007

Terror Tour 2/16/2007

I finally thought that I was going to wake up in the morning and not see Misha, but I wasn’t so lucky, as he arrived very early in the morning. When Buske used Misha’s own word on him and asked if the weather was “bomb” outside, Misha told us that “Weather can’t be bomb, only food can be bomb.” You truly do learn something new everyday.

We piled in the van and began the drive to San Diego. A few people made the drive down on their own, so the remainder of us got to spread out and enjoy the sweltering heat of van life in California without air conditioning. The ten hours I slept the night before wasn’t enough and I passed out for awhile.

I awoke to something very strange. We were stuck in traffic in California. Oh wait, that happens to everyone who lives there, everyday! This actually made us late for load in. It wouldn’t be Terror, unless we were fashionably late.

When we finally did arrive we got quite a surprise; Stick To Your Guns decided to play a show! We hadn’t seen them in over 10 days and they were now $13,000 lighter in the pockets after paying for a myriad of van repairs.

The show was COMPLETELY sold out and over 300 people actually got turned away. Buying a ticket in advance is a very new idea for a hardcore kid.

Soma was rocking from the very first note of Stick To Your Guns to the final second of Terror’s set. San Diego is Spanish for, “a whale’s vagina” and is a great place to play a show at or visit.

Martin, Buske, Catherine, and I made the drive back alone to Martin’s house in Whittier. Who is Catherine? She is Martine’s Canadian fiancée who flew in to spend some time with Martin before he departs for Australia. She is not just your ordinary Canadian fiancée; she is a French-Canadian fiancée with a tattoo that says, “Wiener (sic) Dog’s Rule!” You can only imagine the wacky hijinks that ensue between her and her African American counterpart. She is a curious little critter who tells me things like, “You had the chance to drain your balls yesterday.” La soupe est trop chaude!

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Thursday, March 1, 2007

Terror Tour 2/15/2007

Immediately after the show, we drove straight to Los Angeles. Everyone really wanted to get home, and I can’t blame them. We drove the 6 hours through the night and ended up dropping everyone off about 8 in the morning.

I had these grand plans of going to the movies and getting all sorts of things accomplished before the show started. The only thing I actually got accomplished was sleeping for 10 hours on Scott’s couch and then going to a diner and seeing 2 transvestites. The one looked like “New York’s” Mom. Ever see that HBO show about Transsexual Prostitutes in Honolulu. Remember the blonde one? I so would.

We rolled up to the show and I was very excited that the Knitting Factory is located right by John Tesh’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. John Tesh composed “Roundball Rock” which served as the NBA on NBC’s theme song from 1993-2002 and had the best on screen chemistry with Mary Hart on Entertainment Tonight than any other host since. Bob Goen and Mark Steines are mere imposters to Tesh’s throne.

The show was in the smaller room of the Knitting Factory, which is the ONLY L.A. club that Terror is allowed to play at, thanks to a mild “riot” at the Whiskey in 2004. The smaller room holds around 400 and the show was SOLD OUT! 250 some people got turned away. However, Misha ran some scam that got 100 people in and he made over 100 dollars. What a shithead. You can’t deny his entrepreneurial spirit though. The show that was in the big room only had about 50 people in it. Awesome.

Los Angeles was definitely in the house and represented hard. No real drama to speak of, and 1,000 stagedives later, the show ended a complete success.

During the show, I was very busy and hated everyone. I talked with some “acquaintances” and made a pact to marry a young lady if I wasn’t hitched by the time I was 30. These are the kind of things that go through my head at work / on tour. Everyday I get up and hope to somehow have an epiphany that will steer me on the correct path through the remainder of my life. I’m still waiting for that vision, until then I guess I will just have to sleep a lot and continue being a personal assistant to Frank 3 Gun and Martin Stewart.

A separate young lady thought that I was hitting on her just because I asked her if she was attracted to me and she told me I was coming on too strong. I really wasn’t hitting on her; my self esteem is just so despairingly low that I seek out anyone, including complete strangers, to pay me insincere compliments to help me feel better about myself.

Buske and I went and stayed at Nick’s house for the night. I took apart the couch and found a grape in it. Gross. I hate fruit.

Terror Tour 2/14/2007

A few of the guys stayed out VERY late and didn't go to bed at all the previous night. Nick Jett was one of them, but we still let him drive. Terror really does not care about being alive. It was quite apparent that we weren't going to make it through the mountains in one piece, so Martin and I acted weird and moved into the driver and passenger seats instead of sleeping the ENTIRE ride like we normally would.

We drove through some beautiful country and had a great bonding experience together. I'll get gay; Martin is a great guy and I am glad that he and I have become such close friends. Carl was my personal anchor in 2004-2005 Terror, and Frank has always been a great friend to me and was responsible for me touring with the band in the first place. I wasn't sure how I would feel without them in the band. Martin and Buske, although totally different people, have really come in and made an impact in my life and with Terror, and I love them both.

Martin and I got to see some great scenery (really getting gay) on the drive from Portland to Northern California and we listened to Nitro, Dimmu Borgir, Vision of Disorder, Behemoth, Kamelot, and Warzone on the way. I also continued reading Harry Potter book 5, yes I know, the Gaydar just cracked.

We made it to Orangevale and had to deal with the local soundman, Claude. Although he is quite funny, he was just too much to deal with on this day. He said that the drum mic sounded like it was "stuck up an elephant's vagina," and promised to take us to "Tone Town."

It was Valentine's Day and "Ang" Buske sent us all conversation hearts. How thoughtful! I got an unexpected Valentine from someone else too, which was very nice! Alright listen, I have said that I might be bi before…this blog just cements that theory. I'm sorry. Wait, I'll redeem myself; bitches, fucking, action movies, sports, beer, and wings.

Eric Thomas was at the show. Eric is a legendary member of the Northern California hardcore scene, the frontman for Murder Machine, fill-in drummer for Vio-Lence, a former personal security guard for 3rd Eye Blind, and former Terror tour manager. Eric Thomas could have tour managed Metallica he was so thorough! He not only advanced the shows, he advanced pretzels. He once tour managed a sexual escapade in the van by doing everything short of having permission slips signed by the guilty parties.

The show was good considering it was Valentine's Day. Why that would affect a show's turnout, I will never know…Maybe I'm not totally gay. Fat Jugs Hernandez (Terror’s current tour manager) threatened to beat up All Shall Perish's fill in merch guy. Just another day at the office, I guess.